i always ask myself will boredem ever have its attempt to kill a person?

now wen im stuck in boredem mood i realize you cant die from boredem but you can go through horrible memories and being stuck in boredem makes you realize many flaws in you life and start doubting and when boredem hits you start to doubt about things thats going on in your life and things that are making a progress… you start to think negative and dont realize your happy with everything you got in life.

you just continue to realize the mistakes that you’ve made in the past and start to regret about many things that werent a sucess in your past. but now as i sit here at my boyfriends working place i realize that many people dont care about their friendship with their friend if their running a busniess of their own. they dont care if one of their workers is one of their close friend that tries his hardest to always be there to catch them when they fall. but i guess it doesnt matter having a business is you being harsh and not caring about your friendship with someone unless you got the cash going into your pocket.

but at the same time even though i have mood swings i should try to control them and realize if i keep acting the way i am being a bitch and being so up tight will make me eventually lose my BOYFRIEND that i really love. Life is hard and i finially found the time to think things through. going through the things im going through makes me reallize how patient and how caring my boyfriend is towards me. i had to realize that he will be here. im just so terrified that he’s going to leave but when that day came when he ask me ” babe would u leave me for someone handsomer?” made me realize that i wasnt the only person in this relationship terrified to lose their significant other. being with my BOYFRIEND, MY EVERYTHING made me realize that i have so much oppurtunities in front of me if i wasnt so lazy. He’s made me realize that i have alot of potential in me and that i shouldnt listen to ppl who tries to put me down..

i love my boyfriend and i hope and pray to god our relationship survives the rollercoaster rides through out the entire relationship period… est 052220100315